Friday, June 13, 2008

Caution required

I read a couple of things recently that struck me as unusual. First, I bought a frisbee recently and I think it would be fair to describe the manufacturers as paranoid. Let me just give you a taster:

Make sure that people around you know you are playing with a flying toy. For use only in large outdoor recreational areas. Do not throw toy near traffic, buildings, trees, overhead wires, people or other obstructions. Do not use during electrical storms, snow, rain, high winds or other adverse weather conditions.
They really are spoil sports…

This toy contains small parts which may be hazardous.
Erm… no it doesn’t…

Remove all packaging, clips, staples, ties and similar attachments before giving this toy to a child.
Maybe they are referring to hair clips and a tie you where round your neck because the Frisbee came with no packaging at all.

Warning! This product is a toy and should not be used in competitive sports.
I will have to use another ‘professional’ Frisbee to take this up competitively. Except don’t you have maintain amateur status to take part in the Olympics? It’s a dilemma…

Second, the other day I bought a book on gardening from a charity shop and basically it was made up of various questions and the book provided the answers. For example (and I can provide the answers if needed!):

How and when should I trim my informal flowering hedge?

Can roses be grown with other plants?

I am worried that the toadstools on my own lawn may be poisonous. How can I get rid of them?

I think we can say that the book is fairly middle class, but then it surpassed itself:

Where the chalk lines are marked out on my lawn tennis court the turf seems much greener and more vigorous than the rest of the lawn. Does this mean my lawn needs lime?

Your lawn tennis court? Who has their own lawn tennis court?? I think the somewhat obvious answer to this pesky lawn problem is to ask your butler to tell the groundsman to get a man out to deal with it. I am shocked they have let it deteriorate in this way, what will the Jones’ say when they come over for Pimms?


Blue soup said...

I expect the Jones's will comment on how vibrant the grass is where the lines were... ;)

Game of Tennis?

Random Reflections said...

blue soup - true - and it's always nice to be able to point out how hard the hired help has been working.

A game of tennis - but that would damage the beautiful lawn!