Thursday, May 08, 2008

Smugness

I went out for dinner with a friend last night. We went to Giraffe, which is normally a nice place, and it was this time, but the service was so slow and so disorganised. We got there before 7pm and wanted to order from the menu that is only available until 7pm, but by the time they came to take our order it was gone 7pm and they said it was too late. To give them their dues, I did point out that we had been there for a while and they went off and spoke to a manager who agreed we could order from the menu we wanted. But even that took ages to get agreed. Nice food but poor service throughout.

I read yesterday that Sheriff Ken Boris is going to ban alcohol on the tube from 1 June. Even as a non-drinker I have a few issues with this. First, a rule is only as good as the ability to enforce it and there is no way that it will be possible to stop quite a lot of the people drinking on the tube. Are they going to start searching people for illicit alcohol? Will they ban people from the tube who have just bought their weekly shop at Sainsbury’s including a can of beer or two to be consumed at home? I would also say that is the problem really caused by people who drink on the tube or by those who have spent the evening drinking in London and are heading home? Are they really tackling the right people?

I do have solution to this problem though. I think that everyone should be breathalysed before they are allowed to board a tube train - people who are teetotal such as myself may carry the “card of smugness” which means that you can just flash the card and walk past the queues of people being breathalysed and go immediately to the platform without delay. Anybody found to have drunk alcohol will not be able to use public transport. This will have a number of effects:

- More cars on the road, including drunk drivers who aren’t allowed to use the tube. We will therefore need more traffic police officers to detect them. This increase in police officers will mean more people in employment and therefore reduce unemployment figures.
- More cars on the road will also mean that potentially more revenue will be raised through congestion charging.
- Some people may choose to walk instead, thus increasing the fitness of the nation.
- Those allowed to travel by tube will be greatly decreased in number thus making the tube less crowded and me more likely to get a seat. This would make me happy. This is what is important.

Perhaps Boris isn’t going to be so bad after all.

7 comments:

Spudgy said...

So ye didn't get drunk and disorderly last nite then?!

Boris's plan is to only ban open bottles/cans of booze. I heartily agree with this and I'm a drinker too! I am fed up of being harassed by drunk men of a certain age on tube stations (and I don't mean young oiks either!)

TOM FOOLERY said...

"card of smugness" I just love it, so funny TFX :)

Random Reflections said...

spudgy - I manage to stay entirely sober, although the slow service did almost drive me to drink.

I can see that there are positives to stopping people drinking, I am doubtful about how easy it will be to enforce though. People still smoke on the tube sometimes and that has been banned for years.

TF - I will let you have a laminated one if you like.

Kahless said...

Give Boris a chance!
:-)

Random Reflections said...

kahless - if I get a seat all the way to work and home again on the tube every day then I'm happy to support him. I think more of his policies should be specifically about making my life easier!

Spudgy said...

I've been reading a bit about Palestine and its problems. One of the interviews was about the No smoking signs in the 'parliment'. Golda Meir ignored it and puffed away. However, the reasoning they gave was it was better to have just one ignoring the sign than not having the signs at all.

I gotta stop reading grown up books!!

Random Reflections said...

spudgy -See whatyou mean. I suppose it also creates a 'culture' of it not being acceptable which will mean most peopelwopn't do it but there will always be a minority who flout the rules regardless.