Running late

Yesterday did not start well. I forgot to reset my alarm on Sunday night so it was due to go off at 9.15am instead of 7am. So when I woke up at 7.55am and looked at the time, my blood did run slightly cold... Anyway, there’s nothing like a bit of adrenaline to get you going in the morning.

My head of unit returned from leave yesterday. I was hoping that, as she had been off relaxing and is in the last few weeks before she retires, she might be on better form. Sadly I was wrong and she sent an e-mail to my boss yesterday morning that was a dig at me, based on a complete mis-recollection, on her part, of an e-mail exchange. She also copied in my new head of unit which was particularly kind of her. My boss, being his usual spineless self, then sent me an e-mail totally acquiescing to my head of unit’s every whim. I sent back a rather terse reply attempting to more accurately explain the situation and attached the e-mail my head of unit had referred to (which wasn’t even to me and was incredibly vague and just sort of mentioned my name).

I know my head of unit is going imminently but my boss will still be here and he is so difficult to deal with. He will say whatever he thinks people want to hear. I have a meeting with him on Friday and will raise some concerns then but I know he will just say things like “There’s no point disagreeing with [head of unit] as you’ll never win. Anyway, she’s leaving in a few weeks time and it will be different then” Except that I don’t think it will be any different because my boss won’t make decisions about anything and as a team we feel as though we just drift somewhat aimlessly with no support or guidance from above.

Working where I do makes me moan a lot, which I don’t think is a good thing. I would just like to work somewhere where we actually get things done and respect each other and make decisions. I don’t think that is too much to ask.

In order to feel as though there might at least be some hope of escape, I e-mailed my old boss to mention to him that I would be interested in working for him again. He replied and said that he didn’t know of any vacancies that are coming up in the foreseeable future (why does that seem to be some many people’s phrase of choice at the moment?), but he’d certainly keep me in mind. So not all that positive but at least I have given an indication of my interest. Strangely, after that e-mail exchange with my old boss, I saw that an advert has gone out for a job where I used to work with A and it would actually be a very good job. But in the circumstances, I can’t apply for it because it would be a bit of a nightmare to work together again.

There is a part of me that is sort of toying with the idea of applying for the job anyway though. I do find it frustrating that A’s refusal to be civil impacts on me and I therefore have to make decisions based on someone not wanting to have anything to do with me rather than on whether it is a job that I might actually want. Instead I carry on working in an environment that I don’t like and have to ignore a job that I would actually want to do. Such is life I guess.